Don't play it safe..........resist the seductions of our society.....mid life crisis

And most of all, don't play it safe. Resist the seductions of the cowardly values our society has come to prize so highly: comfort, convenience, security, predictability, control. These, too, are nets. Above all, resist the fear of failure. Yes, you will make mistakes. But they will be your mistakes, not someone else's. And you will survive them, and you will know yourself better for having made them, and you will be a fuller and a stronger person.

It means not just going with the flow. It means not just "getting into" whatever school or program comes next. It means figuring out what you want for yourself, not what your parents want, or your peers want, or your school wants, or your society wants. Originating your own values. Thinking your way toward your own definition of success. Not simply accepting the life that you've been handed. Not simply accepting the choices you've been handed. When you walk into Starbucks, you're offered a choice among a latte and a macchiato and an espresso and a few other things, but you can also make another choice. You can turn around and walk out. When you walk into college, you are offered a choice among law and medicine and investment banking and consulting and a few other things, but again, you can also do something else, something that no one has thought of before.

But either way, either because you went with the flow or because you set your course very early, you wake up one day, maybe 20 years later, and you wonder what happened: how you got there, what it all means. Not what it means in the "big picture," whatever that is, but what it means to you. Why you're doing it, what it's all for. It sounds like a cliché, this "waking up one day," but it's called having a midlife crisis, and it happens to people all the time.

http://chronicle.com/article/What-Are-You-Going-to-Do-With/124651/

How is this serving the child?

How is this serving the child?

http://www.littleearth.school.nz/blog/how-is-this-serving 

By

Tessa

on 20 Apr 2016

Our young children are constantly asking questions.  They do this for information, to clarify, to connect, to fill silence - for a huge host of reasons.  Somewhere down the track we lose that tendency and as adults we don't seem to question things nearly enough. 
When we genuinely and deeply care about children, however, we need to be questioning what it is they are experiencing and exposed to, or alternatively, are missing out on.   Alfie Kohn speaks the very core in us when he says "too many educators seem to have lost their capacity to be outraged by outrageous things".  Our sector has gotten off course in many areas and it's important not to just follow suit or accept the 'norm' as being acceptable. 
Justifications can be made for a lot of things, and it is easy to get swept up in the current and go with what we see happening all around us.  OR we can be brave and ask our own questions.  We can ask what is in our power to change? What is truly best for children? Which 'experts' are actually credible and also fit with our gut instincts?  What is it like for the children in our care?  How would we like this experience? 
Maybe what we need to accompany our questions is a good solid answer, one that acts as a yardstick for measuring our uncertainties against.  If we look at what Dr Montessori espoused, our role is to serve children.  Not lead them, ‘prepare’ them or isolate them from the real and natural world, but to SERVE them. 
Service comes from looking at the needs of the other, not of ourselves.  Knowing this, we can create the question, ‘how is this serving the child’? whenever we come across new ideas, doubts, or the ‘norm’ that doesn’t necessarily sit well with us. We also need to know it is about serving the child right now, not asking how it will serve them in years to come.  We want to focus on today, knowing that tomorrow will take care of itself.  Too often, a justification for some of the less heart-centred practices can be about creating independence in the child, or resiliency for later years, when at this age love and kindness have to be at the fore.
Our question then, has to be ‘how is this serving the child?’ whenever we come across new ideas, doubts, or the ‘norm’ that doesn’t necessarily sit well with us. 
We can look at what we are currently doing and say, yes it may be different from what else we see but it feels right, and for the children and families we serve it is preferable. 
This takes a certain courage, and willingness to step outside the norm, but in keeping with service to the child, there is no other way.  Once we start to question, our only way is forward, to forge on a path based on what we believe and with the ‘tribe‘ of like minded educators we connect with when we share our views respectfully.  We can follow our hearts and know that change for children can start small. 
We cannot change the whole system but we can certainly make the best choices possible for those we do serve.  In doing so, we can hope to send out ripples of heart centred, kind practice which others may just be looking to be swept up in. 

Decluttering progress!!

A note on my decluttering!!!
Since I let the bike go I feel an incredible mind shift has occurred. I am now able to go through my other possessions with greater clarity and determine which items are to be kept, which to try and sell and which to donate or toss out. It's weird that I should have this clarity and ease now, but it's here and I am happy to embrace it.

This weekend my goods will be for sale and I'm hopeful that at least some of them will go. Those that don't get sold....uuummmm..... I hope to find a place to donate them. The challenge the shoes and dresses is that I need to find a person just the same size as me, and who is willing to buy them. The shoes won't just fit anyone, nor will the dresses.

Lots of other Bric-a-brac for sale - jewellery, TRX, yoga mat, children's books, teaching resources, bike parts, tubes, bike stand, ornaments, scarves, etc.

What is the feeling behind the words? Being Kind over being right

http://kristinecarlson.com/what-is-the-feeling-behind-the-words

If you are present, you’ll choose to be kind over being right, and you can choose to truly listen to the hearts of your closest companions. You can choose to listen to the feelings over the content or words of what is spoken from the heart.

One of the easiest things you can do is shower those around with you with appreciation and praise, and watch everyone around you perform with more ease and grace.

You can also realize those moments when someone is feeling taken for granted and may not risk saying so.

Being committed to authentic expression comes with some risk—but what lies unspoken leaves resentment lurking in the shadows and often can be the demise of a wonderful relationship. And, your truest relationships, whether it be your spouse, friends, co-workers or children will appreciate knowing that they can count on you to be honest with how you feel so that they have the opportunity to honor your heart and feelings with a pure reflection of love and genuine appreciation.

One of the most beautiful things about age, is that we know when it’s important to allow our authentic expression to emerge heartfelt and loving without apology—as we are calling in those true connections to support us in living our most vibrant lives.

By Kristine Carlson|April 21st, 2016|

Just placing this here today so that I can digest it.

Ouch - letting go

I decided that I would sell my red Cannondale Road bike that I have had for several years and haven't been riding that  much recently.

I advertised it on FB and people were interested. This guy came today and purchased the bike for USD$320 (AUD$414)and I tossed in really old bike shoes with cleats (I have a new pair), the bike stand, tyre levers, a seat cover, repair kit and a great chain cleaning kit. He was thrilled.

I'm trying to prove to myself if I can let go of the Cannondale then I can let go of any of my material possessions. I don't want to be owned by my possessions. They can all be replaced.

The bike in fact has been the love of my life for over 10 years - which is more than any personal relationship that I have had with an intimate partner!!

That bike had done a couple of trips to France, a few Phuket Triathlons , cycled Japan on beautiful smooth roads, cycled in Laos and a Cairns to Karumba trip in Australia in 2011. I had so much enjoyment riding that bike.
Anyway I had owned the bike since 2004 and it had served me exceptionally well but it was time to let it go..... I am a little sad but it's ok - it's just a bike for goodness sake!!

I hope the new owner enjoys that bike for the next 10 years. Carbon forks and seat post, weighs less than 10kg, smooth and fast, odometer. Let it go!!!

12 Steps for Self Care......never give up on your dreams

My Dream .....to feed my soul.....with nature....

Helen: My dream is to be in nature, embrace the beauty, live somewhere to feed my soul.

Sometimes it requires giving up the person we want to be in order to fully appreciate the person we are. Joshua Becker.